Let Go
Simple words, right? I know. I’ve read to “let go” in self-help books. Heard it in YouTube videos: “Let go of the [fill in the blank].” So, I know what the words mean. It’s just implementing them into practice that is a bit tricky.
You see, we’re programmed to survive. Our DNA, wiring, whatever you want to call it, is capable of surviving. Being a survivor means you go through battles and come out alive. Not healed – alive. We get through stuff, sometimes by the skin of our teeth, and move on to the next mountain, battle, challenge, whatever. Life is tough.
We are not programmed to let go. That would mean giving up our power to survive. How many of us can do that? It’s been a real challenge for me, and I’ve been studying this stuff for years. I could write a blog post or a book about it based on all the knowledge I’ve accumulated. But put it into practice – well, let’s just say – I’m not there fully – yet. It’s hard to do!
Humans (at least modern humans) have been choosing “fight or flight” to survive. We either choose to run away from a situation or stay and fight it. Why don’t we have something else to do, like “deal with it appropriately”? We weren’t taught how to handle life’s challenges effectively.
Let Go
Doesn’t it sound easy to let go? It should be. The challenge is that we keep up the wall to protect ourselves and can’t seem to take it down, for fear of getting hurt. I’m not talking to that stranger in line at the grocery store. I don’t know them. Just that simple thought is a product of our protective walls, always on guard.
But try to let go and see what happens.
I’ve done it enough times to tell you that it’s freeing and makes you feel good.
So, how do you do it? Why should we do it?
Why Should We Do It?
First, it does the body good. When we let go, we relax. And when we relax our bodies, we enter the “rest and digest” state. Our bodies can heal when we’re relaxed. It’s a much better state to be in.
How Do You Do It?
Well, this may seem counterintuitive, but you have to do some work. We must be accountable for our thoughts. It takes work to be aware of our thoughts. It does get easier the more we do it.
Once we become aware of our thoughts, then we have to believe with every fiber of our being that everything is going to work out okay, the way it’s supposed to. Some people believe in a higher power like God or Jesus Christ; others believe in a universal force at play here, or whatever you believe in that is bigger than yourself. Whatever it is, we need to lean into that power to take the pressure off ourselves.
Now, this isn’t to say that we don’t have to do anything – call out to a higher power, let go, relax, and everything we want will come to us.
Not at all. We still have a responsibility for our lives.
Relax
Allowing our bodies to relax and let go of the tight grip we have on ourselves opens up our lives. We see new paths to take that weren’t there before. We take more chances knowing everything will work out okay. (I mean chances in a productive/goal-oriented manner, like meeting new people or starting a business, not bungee jumping or learning how to swallow a sword. Just being clear about my intentions. Overthinker here.)
Giving up some control and letting go allows us to be freer. Oh, your boss made you feel like an idiot in front of your coworkers when she chastised your work. How are you going to play it?
Will you seethe under your breath and pretend it doesn’t bother you, only to have it work its way out once you’re alone? How about running to the bathroom, hiding, and crying (really giving up your power), or the third option is seeing the situation for what it is – your boss is not professional or rational, and you did your best. You trust (let go) that your integrity and self-awareness are strong enough to neutralize an irrational situation you have little to no control over.
What Others Do Is Not in Our Power
When we realize that we cannot control anyone except ourselves, life changes. No matter how much we try to manipulate or guilt someone into doing something, people will do what they need to do. We can only know our thoughts and change our behavior.
So, when we find ourselves in a situation that has the potential to harm us (like being around a disrespectful family member or being in a toxic work environment), we need to think first – really quickly – plan it out ahead of time – to respond to the situation instead of reacting.
Doing this takes back your power (not control – power), knowing that you are now in charge of how you feel in that situation.
Because let’s face it, it’s the feelings that we feel that create our experiences. If we could feel strong and let go of the pain (not ignore it – don’t have the negative feelings in the first place), we keep our power.
Having control over a situation means we are the playmakers in everything that happens to us. That is impossible to do. It might even break some universal law or something. We cannot possibly control someone else’s actions or thoughts, or the weather, traffic, or anything else other than ourselves.
Knowing this, doesn’t it make you want to relax your shoulders, breathe deeper, and see life through a calmer lens? I know it does for me.
Let Go and See What Happens
What do we have to lose by letting go? Seriously. Ask yourself this question. If your answer is: then I won’t know what to do. That’s fair. I’ve been there. It’s okay to think that.
But try. Give it a whirl. Start small.
Give up your control to just one thing in your life. Maybe it’s worrying about how someone’s going to react to an email sent or caring about what someone thought of your outfit.
Breathe.
Reframe the thought. How do you feel about the email you sent? What do you think about your outfit? Once you get those answers, it should tell you that it’s okay to let go of the worry. You don’t need to do that. What do you think is more important?
Because what you think is how you feel. And how you feel makes the difference between being stressed out and being calm and relaxed.
If you’re calm and relaxed, you’ve let go of something that caused you angst and/or pain.
Doesn’t that feel better?
Sure, it does.
To Sum Up
Letting go is releasing control, not your power. We have power over our thoughts and our feelings. Being calm is a better state of mind. Believe in a higher power, we’re not alone in this life. Relinquish some of the burden onto fate. Live your life the way you want. Let go. You deserve peace and happiness.
Thank you for reading this. As always, I’d love to read how this resonates with you. Are you going to put any of these suggestions into practice?
To letting go,
Francesca 
Written by a human for humans.
© 2026 FrancescaME | All rights reserved.
Photos taken by Francesca M.E.
NO AI TRAINING: Any use of this publication to “train” generative artificial intelligence (AI) technologies to generate text is expressly prohibited. The author reserves all rights to license uses of this work for generative AI training and development of machine learning language models.
*DISCLAIMER: FrancescaME is not a therapist or doctor, and any information shared is from personal experience, learning, and research.
If you’re suffering, please consult a mental health therapist for help. Just as our bodies need to see a doctor when we’re not well, our minds need care, too.
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